Sunday, January 18, 2009

Frustration


Last night before I went to bed I recognized a challenge that needed to be faced. Sunday mornings are when I usually get up to go to mass in St. Helena, after which I head off to work. My car runs, but unfortunately it has a flat tire and is in need of a whole new set. It also needs a catalytic converter in order to pass smog. Then, of course I need to re-register the vehicle and get sufficient insurance coverage. My life has become frustratingly difficult since I was mowed down by a drunk driver. To top it off, I still have a rash on my left arm where the cast was; and two of my teeth need to be re-capped. Naturally, I started my day checking the bus schedule only to find out that the first bus leaving Calistoga for St. Helena is at 10:15 am., exactly forty-five minutes after the time I am supposed to start work. Great. I tried calling my neighbor to see if I could get a ride. I woke him up and he was not happy about that. I walked into town thinking I might see someone heading 7 miles down the road to St. Helena. It's 9:15 am and no such luck. I stick out my thumb on Hwy. 29 only to watch numerous people whiz by in their S.U.V.'s and sports cars. The migrant workers hanging out at the local gas station are probably watching me with a mix of curiosity and amusement. Finally at 9:30 am I walk back into town to Cal Mart trying to revise my game plan. A friend finally drives by and I call her name... Carol !! She keeps driving, and I suddenly remember that her name is Eleanor. Damn it ! I have a hunch that the number she gave me is for her cell phone. Luckily, I have the new IPhone, so I call the number and she answers. Eleanor has been giving me rides home from the local AA meetings for about a month now. She turns around to pick me up at Cal Mart. Her dog keeps the front seat of her car warm for me. I offer her ten bucks to take me to work but she refuses the money. Once I am in her car I cannot help but think how utterly dependent I am on people and realize that these are the kind of situations I used to drink over. You know, the "F it all and get drunk attitude" can still haunt me no matter how many years of sobriety I have.

2 comments:

Santa in Chicagoland said...

I know what frustration is and can really feel for you. I'm sure you need this worked out sooner rather than later and hope you get it fixed soon.

Viv said...

oh this made me wish I still lived in Calistoga so I could give you a ride...I know a lot of the kitchen and floor staff drive through Calistoga...Right now, wsgr is probably closed, but if you want, I will ask all of them for you...I know how this building works, we are all working for the same cie, but noone knows about each other...I mean, it's not like you volunteered your situation!!!!I am very touched that you concider me as much as you have shown...this is very courageous of you and may I say, you are one hell of a guy.